no.

you heard me, i quit..

i quit this job..
i quit this family..
and, i'm moving out.

you know what?

you can mess with your hair..
and your nose..
and even your face..

but you're THROUGH messing with me..
_____________________________________________________________________

coward?
phoney?

no, you listen up.

you turned out to be exactly who i thought you were..
i never pretended to be somebody else..
its been me all along..
its me who was made fun of in front of anybody..

look, i didnt come here to yell at you..
i came here to tell you that i know how it feels to be afraid to show who you really are..

i was..
but not anymore..

the thing is, i really don't care what people think of me..
because i believe in myself..
and i kn0w that things are going to be okay..

be even though i know that i have nothing left..
its you i feel sorry for..

i know that person who sent those words is still deeply hidden inside of you..
but i cant wait for you..
because waiting for you is like waiting for rain in this drought..
useless and disappointing..

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hahaz.. yup, this entry is sort of dedicated to kelly poon.. well, if you dont know who she is (which by now you should see me coming out of your computer to gun you down). she is the finalist of the project superstar currently airing on channel u.. well, she's the female finalist who sort of won sin1 huey4 because of her huge fanbase.. actually, sinhuey's voice is really quite nice and that she has really improved alot since the beginning.. and she has really changed her looks in terms of her hair and dusty eyes.. so, i sort of like her because of that.. actually, i feel that kelly and sinhuey are equally good in terms of voice and looks.. :p ever since the start, i've noticed kelly for her voice and her looks.. apparently, everyone knows her waaayy before the competition and that she's quite a star liaoz.. now with the added publicity, i found out that two people who are actually quite close to her.. soorrtt offf... weell.. :p i actually love her voice, if you bought her cd, which i will kill anyone who didnt *lol*, her song, 'yi shi de mei hao' is really nice and i heard from a friend that the original singer, zhang1 shao4 han2, who sang it as the ending song in 'hai3 tun2 wan1 lian4 ren2' or some dolphin bay idol drama, sang it very guhrossly and he said that hearing the original version would corrode your ears.. *lol* the song is really nice bcos if you read the lyrics, its very meaningful.. like:
(translated roughly into english)
- if love walks far enough, it will meet up with happiness eventually..
(ai ru guo zhou de gou yuan; ying gai ye hui gen xing fu xiang jian)
- promises are like butterflies, flying beautifully but yet it flies away..
(cheng nuo chang chang xiang hu die; mei li de fei; pan xuan ran hou bu xian)
- using the hand that you used to hold, i wiped the tears that accidently rolled across my mouth..
(bu xiao xing dang yan lei hua guo zui jiao; jiu yong ni wo guo de shou mo diao)
- though fate likes to play jokes on us, i believe that tru hearts will meet one day..
(sui ran ming yun ai kai wan xiao; zhen xing hui he zhen xing yu dao)

the song is really nice.. :p

the ultimate challenge comes on september first, where kelly will try to outsing kelvin (mr blind) to emerge the winner.. really hope she wins.. junyang, sinhuey and kelly, WO YONG YUAN ZHI CHI NI!

tomorrow's the teacher's day celebrations, i got pluffies for the female teachers and chocolat for the male teachers.. plus some old teachers, i would be giving flowers.. so excited..

got to go off to finish my cards liaoz..

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i havent blogged for quite a while liaoz.. well, the times when i want to blog are just not even there.. well, i'll just summarise a few highlights in this period of time..

well, the prelims have come and gone and, well, it was very much of a flop and a wake-up call.. well, its only now that i realise the serious(ness) of the coming o'levels.. its when the teachers put in their heart and soul into us and really want us to do well.. and it sincerely touched me and i really got the sincerity and the love they have for us.. they are even willing to put discomfort into their lives to help us.. well, now i'm sort of mentally prepared to study, no more procrastination i hope.. :p there's only a few weeks left to study and i better buck up..

lots of things happened in this period of time, lots of tears shed and laughter abound.. the esplanade concert is so meaningful to me.. it was the sec4s last time they could step up on stage to perform for a last time with their juniors.. to me, it was a fun-filled and memorable day.. the songs were beautiful and the atmosphere, well..unexplainable.. i remember that i was very nervy just before our performance because philip sort of awkwardly gave me a hug and another person gave me a thumbs-up.. though the hug was a little awkward and rushed, it really touched me because it brought out all the memories and special moments in the past, with or without the juniors.. the pouring of memories made my throat tight and there was a lump there.. at first i controlled my feelings and tears but when i saw some others hugging, it just started me off.. the tears just kept coming and continued to stop and start simultaneously.. it was very weird but..i dunno.. but eventually i told myself to stop just before the performance and i went out to the stage.. the songs were fabulous and i believe that all of us gave our very best.. especially 'circle of life', though it was not majestic and grand, it help a touch of sentimentality and i guess, that was what made it special.. :) after the performance, all of our emotions were very much hyped up.. seeing jingkang shed tears really touched me.. i always thought him as a pillar of strength but seeing shed tears really just started me off because i've never seen a more emotional side of him.. in the end, a few of us sec4s just sat down at the corridor and started to cry.. to others, it may be so stupid and weird but in fact, its just so emotional because we're letting go of 4 years of our life in choir and all the experiences, special times, fun-filled moments that we had.. it seems kinda serial drama/cliche but its very much true.. when i got home that morning/night, each song seemed to hold a special meaning and all the songs i listened to that night help special pieces of my life in them.. if you dont understand, its alright bcos i also dont too.. :p its very hard to put these thoughts and emotions into words.. i'm gonna miss those special moments that we had and miss all those that i'm gonna let go of in this choir.. i guess that's what makes EBChoir unique and different from other choirs, because EBChoir is a closely knitted pack of people despite the different groups of people.. when it comes to performances and competitions, they perform with one heart; one soul and one voice.. though we have met horrid times via scoldings and punishments, it has made us stronger and who we are today..

i'm gonna miss lots of peeps..

gonna play my piano already.. till another day..

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